Upside Down
Yesterday, I preached my first sermon for my preaching class. Our instructor requires that we stand in the big formal pulpit to preach. It was very intimidating to be in that space. Just standing in that spot, towering above the room, with the microphone in front of my face was such an unusual experience. The space limits my ability to move around as much I am used to doing. I had to be very intentional about not waving my arms around and not shifting my weight too much. I had to plant my feet and use gestures very intentionally. I practiced several times just saying the sermon aloud in that spot and I’m glad that I did, it helped make me feel a bit more comfortable.
Interestingly, after I wrote the sermon, I wasn’t all that crazy about it. I just wasn’t as excited about my ideas and my images as I have been for previous sermons that I written. I felt like it was sort of mediocre and not very original. But, it was what I came up with so I decided to just go with it. After I practiced it aloud I felt better about it - something about it worked better aloud than in print. And, I decided that not every sermon I write is going to be the best or most exciting or most original. The reality is that I’m going to write sermons every week and only a handful will be really remarkable. So, I decided that I’d just “walk the dog proudly” as my friend says - I’d just deliver the sermon with all the confidence and authority that I would something that I was really excited about. It turned out much better than I expected.
I got great feedback from my peers about what worked and what didn’t work. They taught me a lot about my style and what helped them relate to me and what I did that was awkward and ineffective.
The text that is the basis for the sermon is Mark 8:27-38. The sermon follows.
Upside Down
When I graduated from high school, I went to Disneyland with my classmates for ‘Grad Nite.’ On Grad Nite, Disneyland opened it doors from midnight to 6am just for graduating seniors. We made the trip by bus, arriving at midnight and then returning home immediately afterwards. Naturally, none of us slept on the 4-hour bus trip home as we were entirely too busy gossiping about who had been seen making out with who near the wishing well at Cinderella’s castle. When my mom picked me up and drove me home, I remember thinking that I was more tired than I’d ever been in my whole life and all I wanted to do was fall into bed and sleep.
When I arrived home, however, things weren’t quite as I expected them to be. First, my bedroom door was closed. My bedroom door was never closed, so immediately I recognized it as out of the ordinary. I opened the door and saw streamers criss-crossing the room, balloons hung all over the place, and a big banner on the wall that said “Congratulations Julie.”
“Isn’t this cute?” I thought to myself. “My friends decorated my room while I was gone.” But, as I looked more closely at the room, beyond the balloons and the streamers, I discovered that there was more to the “decoration” than I had first realized. Everything in the room was upside down. The posters that lined my walls had been untacked, turned upside down, and tacked in again. The rug on my floor was upside down. All of the figurines in my cabinet were facing backwards. The comforter on my bed, my pillows, the books on my desk, everything that could be upside down was upside down.
At that moment all I wanted to do was sleep. Yet I was compelled to right the room. As tired as I was, as lifeless as I felt, I spent the next hour cleaning the room and putting things back in their right order. I turned the figurines so that they would face forward, I righted the rug, reorganized the things on my desk, and put the posters back into the right-side-up position. I could not sleep in the chaos and disorganization of the upside down room.
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In today’s gospel story, the disciples have a similar experience. Peter identifies Jesus as the Messiah. The disciples have opened the door and they have seen streamers and balloons and a big sign saying, “Victory.” Because, you see, the disciples have an expectation about what will come next. The disciples expect the Messiah to be a king. And, what do kings do in the Old Testament? Kings kick butt and build temples. The disciples look at the Jesus and see a king that is going to kick some Roman butt.
But Jesus shows them what is beyond what they see in the streamers and balloons of the victory party they are imagining in their heads. He asks them to look beyond their initial view. Not only is he not going to kick butt and build a temple, but he is going to suffer, be rejected, die and rise again. In the mind of the disciples, that is totally upside down.
So, naturally, Peter does what any of us would do, he tries to turn the room right-side-up again. The gospel writer doesn’t tell us what Peter says when he rebukes Jesus, but I’ve always imagine that it goes something like this, “No. No. That’s not going to happen. You’re the Messiah. You aren’t going to suffer and die. Jesus, this is just your insecurities talking. No one will let that happen to you.” But Jesus won’t allow Peter to turn the room over again. Jesus rebukes Satan! Jesus exposes that Satan is setting his mind on human things and not on divine things. Jesus suggests that the disciples’ view of what should happen, the human view, is really the upside-down to the divine.
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It would be nice if, in the next part of the gospel story, Jesus had put a little effort into making us feel a little more comfortable in the upside down room. He could have fed them or performed a miracle. Something that would have made us less disoriented. But, no. Jesus continues to turn things in the room upside down.
Jesus calls the crowd and his disciples so that he can tell them something. Now, it is important here that he calls the crowd. It is important that Jesus says this to everyone. This doesn’t just apply to disciples. It doesn’t just apply to the ‘in’ group. This one applies to everybody. And here is what he says,
“If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake, and for the sake of the gospel, will save it.”
That sounds totally upside-down to me. You know, every time I hear this I think to myself, “Who would buy this?” “Who would follow a leader that told them that in order to live they have to die and if you try to save yourself you will definitely die?
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But, when I look beyond my initial impression, when I look beyond the room I’ve constructed for myself, I realize that what Jesus is saying is true. I know from my own experience that when I’m chasing after my own life – my own dreams, my own concerns, my own worries, my own definitions of success – I lose my life. I become so focused on the goal that I have set for myself, that I lose track of what is important. And I’m never satisfied. No matter how much I achieve, no matter how much I get, no matter how good the grades are, I continue to want more. I’m never satisfied and I always feel empty.
And this is where Jesus and the power of the cross save us from ourselves. Jesus exposes to us that our room is upside down.
Jesus calls us to live in a new way – in the right-side-up room. Jesus calls us to deny ourselves. To limit ourselves. To get out of the way. Jesus calls us to let go of the things that prevent us from participating in the kingdom of God and instead leave us feeling empty and unsatisfied.
And, instead, he tells us to take up our cross. Now, I want to say a couple of things about this. This doesn’t mean that we stoically endure the everyday tragedies of life. Nor does it mean that we learn to live with our shortcomings and failings – “Oh, my big mouth is my cross to bear.” No. Taking up our cross means that we make a deliberate choice to do something that we don’t have to do, but we do it because it serves Jesus in building up the kingdom of God. Taking up our cross means that we take a burden which we are under no obligation to take, except the obligation of God’s covenantal love.
What happens when we live in this room? I’m convinced that we experience new life. I believe that we are energized and empowered by the Holy Spirit. We find ourselves connected to others in authentic and meaningful ways. We feel grounded and stable. It is not easy. It does not mean that we don’t get tired. It doesn’t mean that bad things won’t happen. But we do experience life in a whole new way.
I think today’s gospel invites us to take a look at the rooms that we have constructed for ourselves – to measure them against divine standards. What in your room is upside down? Where are you chasing your dreams and following your own standards for success? What is right side up? Where are you denying yourself so as to serve Jesus and participate in the building up of the kingdom of God? Where can you make changes to make your room more like the room that Jesus describes?